Refined foods, excessive sugar, bad fats, artificial ingredients… You probably eat too much of these, and this is why you’re fat.

What, so you have some sort of “all-natural” breakfast-cereal bar and now you think you’re healthy? Ha! That’s all-natural BS, is what that is.

As a rule of thumb, if your grandma wouldn’t recognise it as food – don’t eat it!

Now not many people would be able to stomach carrots, beetroots and half a head of cabbage for breakfast. But even if I didn’t throw in the pineapple it would’ve still tasted awesome because I recently bought a juicer.


Food affects your mood, concentration span, energy levels and general demeanor. Your body is an engine and food is its fuel, so why would you even consider eating junk?

Well, probably because it’s so convenient and the short-term high hits the same brain receptors that heroin does. Mmm, Egg McMuffins…

The vegetarian lifestyle has a lower fat content than meat-based diets, which is how I’d describe mine, and even though they’re not my everyday choice, vegetables, I’m happy to swallow some of the benefits by having at least one meal a day that doesn’t include bacon.

So I buy a bunch of vegetables I wouldn’t normally eat, blitz them into a purple juice, drink that like a boss, and then just walk straight into compliments all day like Richard Ashcroft walking down the street while giving zero fucks.

The clincher? I’ve started growing my own and so I’m not wasting all that pulp the juicer leaves behind. That all goes into the worm farm, the by-product of which goes back onto my plants. Circle of life, pal.

worm farm

So yes, I’m a part-time vegan now.

Don’t be surprised if my next post is about the joys of not wearing shoes.